Self-avoidance never remains private. It turns outward. It needs an enemy.

A lot of the current problems in the world are downstream of misery.
Not just policy.
Not just culture.
But plain & simple misery.

And misery loves company.
Miserable people don't just suffer.
They recruit.

Misery not owned, becomes blame.
Blame that spreads, becomes a movement.
A movement going mainstream, becomes a culture.

That's when we stop asking, "What's mine to face?"
And start asking, "Who can I blame?"

The self-avoidant become the grandiose,
Fostering a society of scapegoats.

From Brotherhood Weekender - The Warrior Within (2025)

You can feel it in the temperature of conversations.
The volume.
The 'certainty'.
The hunger for enemies.

It's a pattern that I see at all levels in my work:
When we refuse to do the inner work, we make the world pay for our pain.

Just like the raging alcoholic father,
who drinks to outrun what he can’t bear to feel.
He doesn’t just numb himself.

He leaks through the cracks.
Then explodes.
Wounding the ones closest to him.
Just to drink again to numb his growing shame.

Those didn’t cause the pain,
end up carrying the consequences of the avoidant.

That’s the ugly pattern at scale.
Avoidance never remains a private issue.
It turns outward.
It needs an enemy.

Just remember this:
When you point a finger,
three fingers point back at you.

That is where your truth lies.
But most people don’t want the truth,
because the truth hurts.

My bottom line is this:
Most political conflict is personal pain wearing a suit.
The wounded kid dressed up as principle.
An old wound pretending to be virtue.
A nervous system projecting its chaos.

The world doesn’t need more blaming.
It needs more self-honesty.

And that starts…
inside ourselves.

So set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world (Jordan Peterson).

In service of the betterment of men,
Erik
Mentor of Men